i've never been someone who can go with the flow in certain aspects of my life. i tend to hold on to the negative things people say or do towards me. i let stress get to me and eat me alive.
i know it's not healthy, but anxiety is something i have always dealt with.
the past two weeks have tested my body and how it deals with anxiety. i've had a few nights were i have tossed and turned for hours. i have broken down in tears more times then i would like to admit.
i'm worried about my future.
i'm having minor, stupid issues with friends.
i'm worrying about leaving the country for two months this summer.
all of these things i can't really control.
one of my new year's goals was to learn to say "no" and to get rid of the negativity that surrounds me. i need to learn to focus on the good aspects of my life and to let the aspects that are a little worse affect me less.
thankfully, i've been saved this week by friends who mean the world to me.
coffee dates to vent.
nights spent on the couch with just my big lauren, popcorn, and a face mask.
trips to panera for chicken noodle soup.
i saw my body crack under the stress this past weekend when i got the stomach flu for the second time in a week. i know what my body can and can not handle.
i'm vowing to do a better job of handling stress this week. to not become so emotionally upset over every "negative" thing that is said or done to me.
sometimes i just need to learn to breathe.