Saturday, September 8, 2012

not how it was supposed to happen

this past weekend was one of the most disappointing weekends of my life, and sunday was spent mostly in tears.  in fact i had to skip my first class monday morning because my eyes were so swollen.

you see, since last year my group of six friends and i knew we would be rushing for a certain sorority come this fall.  last week was rush week and it was incredibly stressful.  three of my friends ended up dropping out when they got cut from our first choice, which really was terrible.
saturday night was preference night.  i was told i was one hundred percent into the sorority we had wanted and i didn't need to worry.  obviously i was ecstatic.  i loved all of the girls and was so happy because my four other friends were told the same thing.

sunday morning was bid day and when i opened my bid my heart sank.  i didn't get it.  there's nothing like standing in a room full of screaming girls who are SO excited to have gotten in where they wanted and all i could do was burst out in tears.  it wasn't happening like it was supposed to.  my other four friends got in.  i got cut that day.

to make matters worse, two of the friends that got cut originally are now transferring.  the third is considering going abroad next semester or transferring as well.

i suddenly thought everything would be different.  i thought we wouldn't see each other anymore and we wouldn't be friends.  and yes, this week we have been busy.  but we have tried to go to dinner together as much as possible, which is nice.  and i know that if we are all really, truly best friends, we'll continue to be best friends.

trust me, it still sucks.  but i've been making new friends while still keeping my best friends.  and in the grand scheme of things, it's not a huge deal.  i think i realized that on wednesday.  it was the four month  anniversary of ev dying, and the first one spent on campus.  it was definitely hard, and i said a little prayer as i passed the dorm where he died.  but compared to that, what is happening now is nothing.
and i think i need to remember that.
speaking of ev.... we all got these amazing bracelets this week.  i love them and i think they are a great reminder of him.
so that's what has been happening this week.... sorry for the lack of posts i have just been adjusting to the life of of student/ athlete/ sorority gal.  hopefully i'll get back to some schedule soon!  what have you guys been up to?



  1. i'm so sorry you've been having a rough time lately :( i hope things turn around for you <3

    p.s. i'm your newest follower :)

    xo brie

  2. Jackie,
    I understand the feeling. My sophomore year was a tough one and I saw myself drifting from my best friend from childhood, whom I went and roomed with freshman and sophomore year, rather quickly. My advice is to just soak in any moments you can get and relish your new friendships. You are such a lovely girl that I know that, by the end of college, you will have curated a beautiful collection of friends. Hope this week gets better.



i'd love for you to say hi! i normally try to reply to your comment here! xo